Everybody Ships It
by apollojusticeforall
Summary: Everyone seems to think Phoenix and Edgeworth are dating, and Phoenix finds it hilarious, because of course it's not true, right?


It was all just a big joke. And it was entirely Maya's fault.

She started it one day during one of their numerous face-offs in court. Prosecution and defense presented evidence, slammed desks, pointed fingers. Then, among the usual banter, she covered her mouth with her hand and whispered, "Gaaaaaaaaay."

Phoenix assumed he heard her wrong.

Discovering more questions than answers, the Judge extended the trial another day. Phoenix trudged out to the Defendant's Lobby, sweating over how close his client had come to a guilty verdict.

Pearl greeted them there with her usual cheery smile, her lavender robes floating around her as she bounced on her toes. "Wow Mr. Nick! You were amazing in there!"

Phoenix rubbed the back of his neck and offered a sheepish grin. "Aw thanks Pearls. Sometimes I don't feel so amazing though."

Maya snorted, tossing a bundle of black hair over her shoulder. "That's because _I_ do all the hard work. Seriously Nick, how did you not see the bloodstain on the lampshade?"

"I saw it," he protested. In a weaker voice he muttered, "I just didn't know what to do with it."

Pearl sighed and covered her face with her hands. "Oh what would you do without Mystic Maya, Mr. Nick?" She gazed up at him with dreamy eyes. "Ah the fruits of young love."

Phoenix groaned. He was sick of trying to explain to Pearl that he and Maya were _not_ actually a couple. The girl refused to listen, claiming that there was no need to 'hide his passion from her.'

Maya snickered. "I'll say Pearly. You should have seen them today. Damn, the sexual tension was thick."

Phoenix and Pearl both blinked at her in confusion. Before Phoenix could utter a word, Pearl reached up and slapped him across the face.

"Mr. Nick!" she screamed, hands balled into tight fists. "How could you cheat on Mystic Maya like that!?"

"I am not cheating on Mystic Maya!" Phoenix screamed back. His face flushed as he realized the implications of what he just said. Instead of correcting himself, he turned an angry eye on Maya. "Who are you talking about?"

A casual laugh bubbled out of the Master of Kurain. "Oh Nick. Honestly. Who do you think?"

Phoenix was about to snap something back when a deep voice from behind interrupted him. "A rousing performance as any, Wright."

Phoenix jumped before spinning to face his courtroom rival. "E-E-Edgeworth. Uh, same to you."

The prosecutor smirked at him. Despite the intensity of their session in court, his magenta suit remained crisply pressed and not a single silver hair strayed out of place. "As always, I appreciate your efforts. However, it took you significantly longer to connect the lampshade to the rolling pin than I expected."

Phoenix groaned. "You know, if you all figure these things out before me, you can speak up at any point in the trial."

"I prefer not to waste my time on such trivial matters and focus on the more important aspects of the case." Edgeworth's steely gaze bored into Phoenix, but it lacked the usual sharpness it carried when they faced off across the courtroom.

"Trivial matters?" Phoenix echoed with a smirk of his own. "Due to that contradiction, I may have turned the whole case around!"

"So you may think," his rival coolly replied.

Then he heard it again. Maya's voice, in a carefully masked whisper, "Gaaaaaaaaay."

Both attorneys turned to stare at her, Edgeworth with nothing more than a quirked brow and Phoenix in opened-mouthed shock. If Edgeworth had heard what she said, it didn't seem to bother him. "Ah, Miss Fey. A pleasure to see you. I assume you played a great part in the solving of today's riddles. I wonder what this fool of a lawyer would ever do without you."

Maya grinned and finger-gunned him. "That's what I keep saying."

"Indeed." Edgeworth turned his attention back to Phoenix, who still stood frozen. "I trust I will run into you later at the crime scene, Wright?"

"Huh?" Phoenix blinked at him. "Oh, yeah. Sure. Yeah, we'll be there."

Something in Edgeworth's gaze softened, and he actually smiled. "I look forward to it." With a stiff bow of his head, he exited the lobby.

Phoenix stared after him, a bit put out, as all his encounters with his rival left him. When he finally looked back at his companions, he found Maya grinning mischievously and Pearl glaring. Before he could get a word out, Pearl cracked him across the face again. "How dare you, Mr. Nick! Right in front of your special someone!" she shrieked.

Phoenix cradled his stinging cheek. "For the love of God, Pearls! Maya and I are not together!"

"We're really not," Maya confirmed, sliding a comforting arm around her cousin. The younger spirit medium looked as if she was about to burst into tears. "Nick is free to pursue whoever he likes."

"What are you talking about? I'm not pursu—" Realization struck him harder than Pearl's palm. "You're not . . . you don't think . . . _no_!"

"It's okay, Nick," Maya reassured him. A strange glint appeared in her wide brown eyes. "We get it; you've got a crush."

" _On Edgeworth_!?" Phoenix blinked at her, a few seconds passing where he just stared. Then he broke out in a fit of hysterics that left him gasping and holding his sides. "That's absurd! Where would you even get an insane idea like that?" he forced out between his laughter.

Maya rolled her eyes. "Really here, we can all see it. Even Pearly can, and she's convinced you and I are hopelessly in love."

Phoenix glanced down at Pearl. She pushed up her sleeve and balled her fist as if she were getting ready to smack him again.

He shook his head. "Oh my God, this is the funniest thing. You think Edgeworth and I . . ." He heaved a few deep breaths to calm himself. "You know, you are totally starting to sound like Pearl here." He straightened himself up and strode towards the exit, his two companions on his tail.

"Whatever you say Nick." Maya dismissed his comment with a flick of her hand. "I know what I see, and all I'm stating is the truth."

Phoenix chuckled again. "Okay Maya, but I think you should stick with spirit channeling and leave the matchmaking to Pearl. She's far more enthusiastic."

A smirk tugged at the corner of Maya's mouth. "Oh we'll see."

He snickered again as he thought of her ridiculous accusation. A crush? On Edgeworth? Crazy. They were just very good friends. Childhood friends even. True, they had a brief reprieve in their friendship where Phoenix had to become a defense attorney just to see him again and save him from the darkness that shrouded himself and the clutches of his insane, evil mentor, but that's what friends were for, right? He'd do that for anyone. And yeah, since Edgeworth had come back they'd hung out a lot during and outside of work, but that was just old chums catching up on lost time.

As the group piled in a cab to take them uptown to the crime scene, Phoenix had successfully convinced himself that Maya's impression of his friendship with Edgeworth was utter nonsense.

* * *

For the exact same crime scene they had visited yesterday, they sure unearthed lots of new clues. Literally. Pearl dug around in the garden out back and found a crusty key among the rotting blueberries. Phoenix took the blueberries as evidence, too. They were about to leave when a screeching voice cut them off.

"Hey you! Young whippersnapper! Yeah you!"

A shockwave rippled through Phoenix's bloodstream, spiking his heartrate. He intended to ignore the voice, until its owner shoved her wrinkly, pale face into his visual field.

"You annoying kids these days! Can't just mind your own business!" Wendy Oldbag prattled. The bright red lipstick lining her mouth did nothing to soften the sharp edge of her voice. "Can't just leave a poor woman alone! You know, back in my day, we had respect for our elders, and we never bothered them about private affairs, much less pried into or interfered with their personal lives! Why we—"

Phoenix stumbled backwards a step as the old bat assaulted his ears with her chatter. It wasn't bad enough she had been the first witness today, but to run into her outside of the courtroom? He wondered when his luck would start to pick up.

"Ms. Old Lady!" Pearl cried, a hand covering her gasp. "What are you doing here? And why are you so upset?"

"That's Ms. Old _bag_ to you, whippersnapper!" the old coot hissed.

 _How is that any better?_ Phoenix just managed to bite back his reply.

The cranky woman continued with barely a pause for breath. "As to what I'm doing here, I'm here to teach this young delinquent a lesson! Kids these days! Have no respect for calling dibs!"

"Dibs on what?" Maya asked, only because Phoenix really didn't want to legitimize this conversation.

"Why, on my Edgey-poo of course!" Oldbag screamed. "He's mine! Who does this whippersnapper think he is, trying to steal him from me!"

Maya clucked her tongue and crossed her arms. "So shameful, isn't it?"

Phoenix's eyes widened. "What? Not this again." He tried to move around the elderly woman blocking his path, but she pushed up into his face again.

"How dare you act such a way in public! You kids have no sense of decency! All of that disgusting flirting! How improper to behave in front of a woman of my caliber! Not to mention the children!" Her nostrils flared and her shoulders heaved as she panted, eyes narrowed to white slits.

 _All this from a woman who once insisted a 'private search' of her be conducted by the prosecutor._ Phoenix popped a hand over his mouth to try to conceal his snigger. "You, too? Seriously? I don't know where you people get these ideas. Since when did debating over decisive evidence equate to flirting?"

"So indecent Nick," Maya chided, echoing Oldbag's words and completely ignoring his teasing tone. "In front of the children, too!" Here she knelt next to Pearl, wrapping a protective arm around her cousin's shoulder. Her lower lip jutted out in a pout, but her eyes showed no sign of true remorse.

Pearl, for her part, displayed a mask of rage rivaling Oldbag. "How could you act such a way in front of me, Mr. Nick?" she exclaimed, all her passion from earlier flooding back. "And Mystic Maya!"

Phoenix couldn't help it now, he started cackling again. "You all really think I'm hitting on Edgeworth? Oh man, I should tell him. I wonder what he'd say." He grinned at the thought. "Do you think he would cry? Nah, he'd probably just write it off as 'illogical.'" Calming himself down, he addressed the three furious females. "Look, in reality here, whatever you think is going on between Edgeworth and I, you're entirely wrong. We're both just very passionate about finding the truth."

"Mm, passionate," Maya repeated, adding a certain emphasis on the word.

He giggled like a school child at her innuendo. No one else found the situation funny, though. Oldbag turned red in the face and continued squawking about hooligans and their disrespect. Pearl scrunched her hands into fists and yelled about him betraying his true love. Only Maya stayed quiet, a small smile on her face that wasn't from humor.

Phoenix waved off their arguments. "Yeah okay, we can finish this later. Let's go see if Gumshoe has any updates for us."

* * *

"Heya pal!" Gumshoe greeted them, cheery as ever. As every other time they saw him, he wore the same faded green trench coat that stretched across his shoulders, his hair a disheveled mess and a smile splitting his face. "Boy, your performance today sure was a show!"

"Thanks, Detective," Phoenix replied with a little swell of pride. He always enjoyed compliments on his work.

"You and Mr. Edgeworth sure went at it! All those objections and finger pointing! Man, it got tense!"

Phoenix rubbed at the back of his neck. "Well, that's kinda how court always goes. Sometimes it feels more like a battle than a trial."

The burly detective chuckled, an action that shook his whole body. "Yeah, but it's not like you guys are really fighting. We all know how you like to tease each other."

"What?" Phoenix stared at him dumbly. Though he considered Edgeworth his friend, sometimes he felt as if the prosecutor's glare could slice him in half. They always found the truth together, but it was never, ever easy.

"Pal." Gumshoe laid a heavy hand on Phoenix's shoulder, startling the blue-suited man with the rare display of physical affection. "I'm just so glad that Mr. Edgeworth has you in his life. He never had many friends and . . . well, you remember what happened last year. But now he has you, and you two just make each other so happy." The detective sniffed, willing back tears. "And I'm just happy you guys are happy. This is something I've wanted for him for a long time. To find someone who cares about him so much."

Seeing the large man brought to such an emotional state caused Phoenix's throat to swell up. "Wow, Gumshoe. It means a lot to hear you say that. I'll always be there for him no matter what happens," Phoenix promised, and he meant it with all his heart. He'd already saved Miles Edgeworth once; he would immediately do it again.

Maya ruined the touching moment by heaving a dramatic sigh. "See Pearly? That is the sign of true love."

Phoenix broke his gaze away from Gumshoe and glared at her. "Maya!" he scolded. "Again? This is getting old."

Gumshoe ignored his outburst and placed his other hand on his shoulder, staring straight into his eyes with a blissful smile. "I'm just so happy for you."

"Detective Scruffy!" Pearl's small voice demanded from below. "Stop encouraging Mr. Nick to cheat on Mystic Maya!" The young girl reached up to slap at Gumshoe but missed and hit Phoenix instead. As Phoenix cried out and rubbed at his sore check, highly likely forming a bruise, he thought maybe she didn't miss.

"Pearly I told you, it's okay. Nick and Edgeworth have my blessing," Maya reiterated.

Her cousin dropped her gaze to her shoes in shame. "But . . . Mystic Maya. Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," she confirmed somberly. The older spirit medium dropped to her knees and lifted Pearl's chin to look into her eyes. "Hey," she whispered, a tender smile taking over her features. "I'm gonna be okay. I'm happy how I am, Pearly, and you need to let Nick live his own life. Okay?"

Witnessing the sincerity in Maya's eyes, Pearl perked up. "Okay!" She bounced on her toes. "Hey, Detective Scruffy! I bet Mr. Edgeworth will ask you to be his best man at their wedding!"

Gumshoe gasped, hands flying off Phoenix's shoulders and over his heart. "Do you really think so? I would be so honored!"

" _Hold it_!" Phoenix cut in. "No one here is getting married, least of all me and Edgeworth."

"I don't know Nick," Maya mused, resting her cheek on her fist. "You guys are moving pretty fast. I'd give it a couple months."

Pearl gasped. "A couple months!? We need to start planning!" This time when she rolled up her sleeve, a new kind of determination gleamed in her eyes. "Detective Scruffy, would you like to help?"

"You want me to help?" Gumshoe parroted, the giddiness in his voice akin to a kid on Christmas. He snapped a salute. "You bet I would! I'll do anything you need, pal!"

Try as he might, Phoenix couldn't get them to transition from planning his imaginary wedding back to the reason they had come. While it finally seemed to break Pearl's illusion of him and Maya as a couple, he didn't like the eagerness they all threw into his alleged love affair. While it still amused him, he didn't want Edgeworth to find out about they were saying. Somehow, he knew he'd regret it.

* * *

Phoenix stood in the defense lobby, mulling over the evidence file and quietly panicking because yesterday's visit with Gumshoe had turned up no new information. As usual, he was heading into the second part of the trial with absolutely no glimpse of the truth. Maya and Pearl gave him a pep talk to try to lift his spirits, but it didn't help much.

Maya was suggesting Phoenix try staring down the witness until they confessed, when the lobby door burst open and a familiar frilly prosecutor stormed into the room. Phoenix turned at the rustle of fabric, expecting Edgeworth, and instead the telltale bite of a whip slashed across his chest.

"Phoenix Wright!" Franziska von Karma cried, curling her whip and snapping it above her head. "I will best you yet!"

"M-M-Ms. von Karma," Phoenix stuttered. "What are you doing here? Have you taken over the case? Is Edgeworth—?"

"My fool of a brother would not give me the case, even when I promised that I could certainly crush you!" Thankfully, she slung her whip back onto her belt (how she was allowed to carry that thing into a state court of law, no one ever knew) and crossed her arms. She fixed Phoenix with a hard glare similar to that of her adoptive brother. "He spluttered some nonsense about 'seeking the truth.' He has fallen far from the von Karma way of perfection. Truly a disgrace to our name!"

"How could you say such mean things about Mr. Edgeworth?" Pearl protested, fixing the prosecutor with a small scowl of her own.

Franziska paused as she stared wide-eyed down at the girl, then her gaze shifted slightly over to Maya. Instead of responding to Pearl's challenge, she resumed sneering at Phoenix.

"My little brother may be blinded by his foolish feelings for a foolish fool of an attorney, but know this Phoenix Wright," she snarled, jabbing a gloved finger in his face. "I hold no such qualms about crushing you under my boot, as such I will do next time we meet, in the name of the von Karma brand of perfection." With one last crack of her whip, she spun on her heel and strutted out of the defense lobby.

Pearl balled up her tiny hands. "That woman is so mean! She has no right to go around hitting people like that!"

Phoenix rubbed his arm, stinging from where the whip-happy prosecutor struck him, and bit back a comment about Pearl's tendency to slap people whom she disagreed with.

The door to the defense lobby flew open again, and Phoenix recoiled in preparation for another whipping. Instead, the more agreeable von Karma sibling appeared.

"Ah, Wright." Edgeworth stood awkwardly half-in half-out the door, panting. "Did Franziska happen to pass by?"

"Um yeah." Phoenix pursed his lips in a frown. "Her whip breezed through here as well."

Edgeworth huffed out a breath and strode further into the room. "Then I fear I must apologize. I meant to warn you of her presence, but I now see such remarks would be ill timed."

"It was nothing I hadn't endured before." Phoenix shrugged. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught Maya trying to sneak Pearl out of the lobby, but the younger girl's squeaks of protest gave her away. "She just whined about how she would someday 'best me and court' and 'destroy my mortal soul' and the rest of that."

Edgeworth pressed his lips together in something that resembled a thin smile. "How predictable." He crossed his arms, tapping a finger idly at his elbow. "Are you prepared for the second round of the trial today?"

"Of course I am!" Phoenix exclaimed, trying to muster up all the bravado and swagger he could. "I will turn this whole case around before His Honor breaks for lunch."

His courtroom rival didn't even blink. "Wright, I know when you're bluffing. Besides, Detective Gumshoe already filled me in on what little evidence you discovered."

 _Traitor._ Even though the detective technically worked for the prosecutor's office. "Well, I'm sure we would have gotten more if those two hadn't been goofing off so much!" His blood froze as he remembered what had distracted them yesterday. His stomach dropped at the thought of Gumshoe telling Edgeworth all about their conversation of fantasy marriage ceremonies.

"Now that doesn't surprise me in the least. That shall be taken into consideration during his next salary evaluation," Edgeworth mused.

Phoenix felt the tension leave his neck. So it appeared Gumshoe hadn't told Edgeworth what happened. Still, Phoenix thought it would be better to tell him himself, so he could play it off as the big joke it was. He forced a laugh. "You wouldn't believe it, Edgeworth. Remember how I told you Pearl thinks Maya and I are dating?"

"Yes, quite an unfortunate arrangement for you. I mean, unless it's true . . ."

"No, you know it's not. Anyway, get this. Now, Maya thinks _you and I_ are dating."

Both Edgeworth's well-kept eyebrows raised in surprise, but his posture remained relaxed. "What a preposterous notion. Wherever did she herald such a falsity?"

A grin tugged at Phoenix's mouth, glad Edgeworth thought it was as silly as he did. "Your guess is as good as mine. Why is everyone trying to play matchmaker with me?"

"Probably because you are a mid-twenties male with a straggling career, whose last relationship ended with your supposed lover poisoning you to hide her murderous crimes." Edgeworth rattled off with a steady gaze. "You're obviously spiraling towards a mid-life crisis."

Phoenix winced at the mention of his previous girlfriend. Sometimes he wished Edgeworth didn't know _everything_ about him. "Hey, I'm not the only available bachelor in the room here."

"True. However, my associates do not believe in pursuing something so frivolous as romantic entanglements."

"You know," Phoenix rubbed his chin, eyes rolled upwards in thought. "Franziska did mention something about your 'foolish feelings' for me. Perhaps she thinks I'm breaking your concentration."

"Absurd," Edgeworth abruptly dismissed. "Either that is another pointless ploy by her to discredit me, or she has misread the strong bond of our friendship."

Phoenix's wide gaze snapped down to Edgeworth's face. While he didn't doubt the prosecutor's words, it was so rare to hear Edgeworth talk about something so personally significant as the concept of friendship.

Edgeworth noticed his stare. "What?"

"Nothing." He hesitated, then decided to be honest. "I'm just glad to hear you call me a friend."

Edgeworth's gaze softened, the stern, stoic mask slipping away and replaced with a small but genuine smile. "You are, as my sister might say, foolishly sentimental."

"I know," Phoenix admitted, returning the smile.

A bailiff entered just then, informing the attorneys that the trial was about to continue and that they should head into the courtroom.

The affectionate Edgeworth vanished, replaced with the cool and collected prosecutor. "To battle we go. I trust you will find the truth today, Wright, as you always do." As he exited, Maya and Pearl reappeared by Phoenix's side.

Maya observed Phoenix's gaze lingering on Edgeworth's retreating form. "So," she drawled with a wicked grin, "how was your make-out session?"

* * *

The Judge called the proceedings into order. He summoned the first witness and directed her to give her testimony on the night of the murder. The sight of Lotta Hart on the witness stand didn't surprise Phoenix, given she was supposedly at the crime scene, but the thought of cross-examining her left a bad taste in his mouth from previous encounters. Her testimony _seemed_ solid, but she always elaborated, and elaborations led to contradictions.

" _Objection_!" Phoenix rubbed his chin, pretending to be in thought. "Ms. Hart. Was the victim really crafting a papier-mâché elephant when you entered his shop?"

"Recken'course!" Lotta insisted, baring her teeth. "It was sitting right up on the table. He looked very busy with it, so I didn't want to disturb him."

Phoenix put his hands on his hips and smirked. He had her now. "Ms. Hart, I'd like you to take a look at this photograph. It's a reference submitted by the victim's client, Mr. Paerteiboi, of the piñata he'd like crafted for his birthday party. You will note that it is not of an elephant, but rather a rhinoceros!"

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?" Lotta wailed, her giant red afro swaying as she lurched backwards.

" _Objection_!" Edgeworth countered. "Wright, what does it matter whether the piñata was an elephant or a rhinoceros? One so primitive as Ms. Hart could easily confuse the two stout creatures."

"Hey! I been to the zoo plenty of times! I know the difference between a polar bear and a turtle!"

Phoenix shook his head, ignoring Lotta's remark and instead focusing on Edgewoth's argument. "Not in this case. You see, the problem isn't what animal Ms. Hart saw, it's _when she saw it_."

"Whaaaaaaaaat?" the Judge cried. "Mr. Wright, explain yourself!"

Phoenix pulled out his notes and tapped them. "On the night of the murder, the victim wasn't working on the piñata, as Ms. Hart claims to have witnessed. By then, he was _already finished_. Recall Ms. Oldbag's testimony yesterday."

Everyone in the court had a collective flashback to the old woman yammering about an object in the corner covered with a sheet.

"The defense asserts that this object was actually the finished piñata!" Phoenix concluded, throwing out his pointer finger for punctuation.

Edgeworth's deep voice interrupted his brief moment of victory. " _Objection_!" He tsked and spread his arms. "Everything you've argued is pure speculation. How are we to determine exactly when the piñata was finished?"

"So you want some decisive evidence then?" Phoenix flashed him a cocky grin.

Edgeworth easily returned the smirk. "You know what they say, Wright, ' _evidence is everything in court_.'"

"Well, Edgeworth, then you'd be impressed to see I have such a piece of evidence right here." Before he could present it, he was interrupted by the harsh gradient of Lotta's voice.

"Do y'all have to do this every time? Can't y'all get a room or something?"

Phoenix's momentum deflated. "E-excuse me?"

Lotta crossed her arms and cocked her head. "You know, the whole sexual banter thing. Where 'evidence' is just a metaphor for your dicks? Or am I reading this whole thing wrong?"

Maya guffawed, while Phoenix held his breath to keep from screaming. It was one thing when Maya teased him outside of the courtroom, but when a witness interrupted him in the middle of presenting evidence? He wished his glare could melt Lotta into the floor.

Lotta didn't stop talking though. "I mean, I'm happy for y'all, but can ya not rub it us single folks' faces? Save that talk for the bedroom, why dontcha?"

Maya laughed so hard, tears streamed down her face. Phoenix tried not to die.

Edgeworth stepped in to save the day. Dude didn't even look phased. He tapped a finger against his crossed arms. "Ms. Hart, what you are tastelessly implying serves no place in this courtroom. Such inappropriate remarks will not be tolerated. If we could return to your testimony, Mr. Wright was just in the middle of proving your statements false."

"Yeah, whatever," Lotta grumbled, glaring off to the side. No one liked being scolded by Edgeworth. "Not my fault ya gotta share what's happenin' in yer pants."

Maya excused herself from the courtroom, bawling with glee.

* * *

They had to yank and claw at it, but eventually the truth emerged in its entirety. Weilde Paerteiboi broke down on the witness stand, screaming into his party hat, popping his balloons, and confessing to the murder. The Judge declared the defendant Not Guilty and directed the bailiffs to escort the hysterical Mr. Paerteiboi to the detention center. The attorneys both gathered their notes and evidence, feeling satisfied with another criminal brought to justice and another innocent life spared.

The Judge tided up his bench and sighed wistfully. "My, what an exciting case that was. Surprisingly, these sorts of crazy turnabouts only ever happen with you two." He peered down at the defense and prosecution. "All my other trials feel so bland compared to yours. I suppose it's only natural." He chuckled to himself. "Well, have fun on your date tonight."

"Thanks, Your Honor—wait, what?" Phoenix looked up at the old man, the lighthearted smile stripped from his face.

The Judge's thick brows furrowed together. "Don't you two usually go out after solving a case together?"

Phoenix glanced across the courtroom at Edgeworth, who mirrored his wary expression. "Sure, we usually go out to dinner, but I wouldn't exactly call it like a—"

"Splendid!" The Judge exclaimed, ignoring Phoenix's attempt at denial. "You kids have fun on your date, then. But not _too_ much fun." He descended the Judge's bench and disappeared into his chambers, mumbling something about the 'fire of young love.'

* * *

Out in the defense lobby, Maya and Pearl shouted their congratulations on winning the case. Phoenix consoled his client, assuring her that she was completely safe now. Then, he turned to his young companions. "So, where should we go to celebrate tonight? Our usual burger joint?"

"Actually, Pearly and I have some other stuff to do. Spirit medium stuff," Maya said.

"We do?" Pearl asked, her eyes wide with confusion. Her lower lip jutted out slightly. "But I wanna get burgers with Mr. Nick."

"If we finish, we can join Nick for burgers later, okay Pearly?" Maya compromised.

"Okay," Pearl gave in, a little begrudgingly. She crossed her arms. "Only if you say we really have to, Mystic Maya."

"Trust me," Maya cast a slippery look towards the door, "we have other places to be."

Edgeworth strode into the lobby towards the little gathering. Phoenix noticed how his friend finally included himself as part of their team instead of hovering awkwardly outside the door. "I suppose congratulations are in order, Wright."

An easy smile stretched Phoenix's face. "You know I could never do it without you."

Edgeworth's gaze connected with his, a tinge of warmth to the steel-grey eyes and the tiny smile that accompanied his expression. "No, you really couldn't." The group started ambling towards the front of the courthouse. "Are we casing our usual fast-food joint you all like as an excuse for real food?"

Something in Phoenix's chest felt light at the way Edgeworth said 'our.' It was great to see him so comfortable around them.

"Pearly and I can't make it," Maya informed him. She placed her hands on her cousin's shoulders and steered her faster towards the exit, despite her squeaks of protest. She glanced over her shoulder at the attorneys left in her wake. "You should go somewhere nice tonight! For the extra special occasion!" She paused and cupped her hands around her mouth. "Oh, and afterwards, make sure you use protection!" Choking on her laughter, she shoved her confused cousin out in front of her.

"Special occasion?" Edgeworth asked.

A jolt of heat shot through Phoenix's chest. He changed the subject before Edgeworth could comment on Maya's parting remark. "We should see if anyone else can come." He spotted Detective Gumshoe balancing an armload of case files and rushed towards him. "Hey Detective! Do you want to celebrate with us?"

Gumshoe stumbled at his shout and nearly dropped all the files. Once he regained his footing, he grinned. "Really? You'd want me there with you?"

"Naturally, Detective," Edgeworth assured him. "You are an instrumental part of solving these cases. Without your investigations, the truth might be buried forever."

"M-M-Mr. Edgeworth!" Gumshoe exclaimed, eyes wide and wet and lower lip wobbling. "That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me, sir!"

"Well, that and Ms. Fey and her cousin canceled on us, so we have no one else left." Phoenix swatted him on the arm. "I mean, we truly would appreciate your company."

"Oh." Gumshoe's gaze fell to the floor. Then his eyebrows raised. "Ohhh. Ya know, Mr. Edgeworth, I really appreciate the offer, and would love to join you, but I got other plans tonight."

"Really?" Phoenix blurted before realizing he sounded as rude as what he had just smacked Edgeworth for.

"Yeah, with Maggey." A blissful smile crossed over the detective's face when he thought of the one other person in the world who got into the same amount of trouble he did. He tried to wave good-bye, but couldn't with all that he was carrying, so he settled with a curt nod. "You guys have a good time together though!"

The pair called their farewells to him and watched him lumber off, bumping into a few people on his way.

Phoenix sighed and looked over at Edgeworth. "I can't believe Gumshoe turned us down. Like, this is a new level of low."

Edgeworth hummed in response, tapping against his arm. His brows furrowed as if he were pondering something, but whatever it was, he decided not to share it.

"I guess we can find someone _else_ to take to dinner with us. How about Franziska?" Phoenix suggested.

"No, I don't believe my sister has yet forgiven me for denying her another opportunity to beat you in court. Even still, I doubt she would be caught dining with us 'fools.'"

Phoenix winced at the thought of an entire evening consisting of lashings from the younger von Karma. "You're right, that's definitely a bad idea. Okay, who else do we know?" He scanned the courtroom entrance foyer and spotted a familiar red afro bobbing their way. "Lotta! Great testifying today! Do you want to join us in celebrating?"

"Shut yer pie hole," the self-proclaimed investigative reporter hissed. "There's no reason to harass a poor gal like me."

"While a bit unprecedented," Edgeworth began, shooting a pointed look at Phoenix, "our offer stands genuine."

Lotta snorted. "Like I would want to sit in the middle of you two. Tell me, do you make all those 'evidence' innuendos outside of court, or is that just to humiliate single witnesses such as me?"

The blood rushed to Phoenix's face in a tidal wave. "Really, that's not what you think it is." Even he could hear his voice wobble.

"Yeah whatever," Lotta huffed, shoving her way past Phoenix. "Go take your love story somewhere far away from me!"

Edgeworth watched her stalk off with a faint sign of amusement swirling in his strom-grey eyes. "Why ever would you wish for _her_ company?"

"What? Uh, I dunno. She was just there and I guess we both know her." Phoenix was sweating now. Certainly the result of lack of air conditioning in the courthouse and _not_ from Lotta's flippant innuendo. Any other night he wouldn't mind spending time alone with Edgeworth, but after everything today he strangely felt panicked by the thought.

"Oh, I got someone we could invite! How about Oldbag?" The instant cringe that took over Edgeworth's face changed his mind. "Yeah you're right, totally bad idea." The two attorneys pushed through the revolving doors of the courthouse and exited into the warm evening air. "It looks like it really might be just us tonight." Phoenix forced a shaky laugh and tried to calm the pounding of his pulse. There was nothing weird about going out to dinner with Edgeworth. They did it all the time. As friends. Despite what everyone else thought.

"Perhaps not just us." Edgeworth pointed down the street, where a man in a trashy orange jacket embarrassed himself in front of a stylish lady.

As soon as Phoenix caught sight of the man in question, a new feeling of dread pooled in his gut. "Really? Him?" He looked over at Edgeworth with pleading eyes.

An indifferent gaze met his. "Wright, he's our childhood friend. He'll certainly wish to relive the 'good old days' with us."

Phoenix heaved an overdramatic sigh. "Fine." He trudged closer to the man. "Hey Larry!"

The man looked up, startled, and the woman he was trying to woo made her escape at his distraction. He seemed to forget about her anyway when he caught sight of the lawyers headed his way. "Niiiiiiiick! Edgeeeeeey!" He bolted over and threw his arms around the both of them in a sloppy hug. "It's been so long!" he sobbed. "I thought you had abandoned meeeeeeee!"

Phoenix patted Larry's arm and tried to pry himself from his old friend's crushing grip. "Larry, we see you all the time. It's more like we can't get rid of you."

"You're here to get rid of me!?" Larry shrieked, releasing his pals and clutching his heart. Tears gushed down his face. "How could you?"

"Nonsense Larry. We're here to invite you to dinner," Edgeworth explained.

"Ohh. Then I accept!" Larry exclaimed, winking and throwing out a thumbs up.

Phoenix smiled. He never thought he'd see the day when he'd be relieved Larry was joining them for dinner. "Great! Nobody else could make it, so we were worried we'd be the only ones—"

"What!? No one else is coming?" Larry jumped back. "No way man, I'm not sitting somewhere with just you two!"

Phoenix's stomach leaped up into his throat again. "What? Why? It'll be like old times."

"Nuh uh! There ain't no old times anymore. I'm such a third wheel around you two! I can't pick up chicks if I'm stuck with the gay guys!"

 _Not this_. Of all of their friends, Phoenix thought Larry would understand. Larry _had_ to understand. "Come on Larry, you know that's not how it is. We're all friends."

Larry clenched his fists and shouted through his teeth, "Well, _I'm_ the friend that has to sit off to the side while you guys talk legal crap and stare into each other's eyes. How come I can't get a girl to look at me the way you look at each other? No thanks man, I'll go home and sulk in my bachelor pad. Pretty Little Liars is better company than you!" With that, he sprinted down the sidewalk, then skidded to a stop and sprinted back the way he came. "The bachelor pad is this way!" he screamed as he breezed past the courthouse, leaving Phoenix and Edgeworth staring after him.

Phoenix wished the sidewalk would open up beneath him and swallow him up. How could this have gotten so out of hand? He could deal with Maya's teasing. Maya was usually wrong about these things; in fact, she was _supposed_ to be wrong. How could everyone have drawn the same false conclusion about him and Edgeworth? Yesterday, he couldn't have laughed hard enough at the prospect of dating his best friend. Now, after all this, it was _so_ not funny anymore.

The prosecutor appeared oblivious to Phoenix's mental crisis. Apparently, their acquaintances' interpretation of their relationship did not plague him in the same manner. After watching Larry scamper away, he only straightened his jacket and deduced, "We seem to have exhausted all our options. Shall we head off to dinner then, Wright?"

* * *

They followed Maya's advice and chose a nicer restaurant near the courthouse. Phoenix figured he could afford to pay for a quality meal for just him and Edgeworth (although it would be nice if the loaded prosecutor sported the bill for once). Their decision was close enough to walk to, so they set off together down the crowded city sidewalks.

His encounter with Larry fried the last of Phoenix's nerves. While he had denied all of them, his friends' allegations over the past two days were starting to grate on him. He and Edgeworth didn't act like a couple, did they? They were just close friends! Close friends go out to dinner all the time! But if _everyone_ thought otherwise . . .

He shook away his thoughts and focused on the pleasant evening. Sticky, humid air surrounded them, but the day was cool enough so they didn't feel like they were suffocating. It wasn't late enough for the sun to set, but the sky started to turn pinker off to the west.

Phoenix wondered if his silence was awkward. Usually, they chatted about the case, and the quiet moments passed in comfort. Phoenix knew he was just letting everyone's comments get to his head. Still, he felt obligated to say something now.

"So, just another day in court, huh?" He cringed at how stupid he sounded.

Edgeworth didn't seem to notice. "Indeed. I had my suspicions about Mr. Paerteiboi from the beginning, and I was confident you would find the piece of evidence to convict him."

Phoenix's heart gave a little jolt that he would _not_ describe as fluttering at Edgeworth's display of his trust in him. He had worked so hard to revive their friendship; he wasn't going to let something as silly as Maya's nagging mess it up. "We make a great team, don't we?"

"Yes. I have to admit, we do." Edgeworth offered a familiar small smile that did _not_ look dazzling in the fading light.

Phoenix jerked his gaze away, having no idea why he was blushing. Or why his fingers were trembling. He shoved his hands in his pockets. After a moment of stiff silence, he cleared his throat and said, "Nice night."

This time Edgeworth quirked a brow at him. "Indeed," he said slowly. "Wright? Are you okay? You're behaving . . . odd."

Phoenix jumped. "Odd? Me? No, I'm perfectly fine! How about you?" He longed to bash his face into a wall. This was getting ridiculous. There was no reason to feel so weird around Miles Edgeworth.

"Good." If his companion felt unsatisfied with his stuttered reasoning, he didn't press it. They continued their stroll, only with Edgeworth now casting strange glances Phoenix's way.

Phoenix commanded himself to breathe and act natural. Just another normal night out with his bro. Bros going on a nice walk before sunset. Bros on their way to enjoy a fancy dinner together—

Oh God, this was sounding more and more like a date. But it wasn't, they were _friends_.

But now, Phoenix noticed things that he was pretty sure friends didn't notice about other friends. Like the way the light reflected of off Edgeworth's silver hair and cast shadows across his angled face. Or how the breeze ruffled the cravat at his neck (who the hell wears a cravat these days and manages to look so good). Or the lighter specks of silver that gleamed in his grey eyes when he looked over at Phoenix.

Phoenix gulped. Edgeworth had just caught him staring in a totally not-friends way. This was rapidly spiraling out of control.

Edgeworth stopped and faced him straight on. "Seriously, Wright. What's going on?"

With Edgeworth staring at him so intently—that little divot between his eyebrows and his lips slightly pursed—Phoenix forgot the fundamentals of language. His jaw bobbed dumbly as he wracked his brain for a safe excuse. After what felt like a suspended eternity, he gave in with a sigh.

"Okay, this is going to sound really crazy and probably totally out of line and I get if it makes you uncomfortable or something—"

" _Wright._ You're rambling. Spit it out." Damn, he knew him too well.

Phoenix stared at his shoes, pulse pounding and every neuron in his brain screaming at him that this was a bad idea. He then inhaled and brought his gaze back up to the man in front of him. "Are they right about us, what everyone says? Are we . . . dating?"

Those intelligent grey eyes widened in shock. Every life function in Phoenix's body grinded to a halt, as if time had died and buried the defense attorney with it. He fully expected the other man to bolt off to the nearest airport and board a plane out of the country. It had taken so long to get Edgeworth to trust him again, and now he had completely ruined it by some stupid suggestion. He would never forgive himself.

But Edgeworth didn't run away. Instead, he stayed rooted in place. He turned away from Phoenix and into the setting sun, arms crossed and features drawn deep in thought. It must have just been the golden evening light because for the first time, Phoenix thought he looked beautiful.

There were multiple reasons for why Phoenix couldn't breathe.

After a moment of careful consideration, Edgeworth voiced his thoughts. "I suppose we have spent quite some time together over the past few months in casual, and even private, settings. Our friend circles have rather merged, as well. You know I've had a difficult past, and I appreciate you being there for me and feel comfortable confiding in you about personal matters. Even in our professional setting, you are the one I trust above anyone else. My knowledge of romantic affairs is rather limited; however, given all the previously stated evidence and the— _ahem_ —affection that I hope is mutual, I logically conclude that," Edgeworth turned back to look at Phoenix, eyes sincere, and the light bringing out the tinge of pink coloring his cheeks, "yes, we are."

A heaviness lifted off Phoenix's chest and he broke into a wide, goofy grin. If his heart had stopped before, it now pumped away at two hundred miles per minute. The discomfort between the two men disappeared, replaced with a rapture that just felt so _right_. He realized he was still grinning like a complete idiot and cleared his throat. "Cool, yeah, I'm glad you feel the same. This isn't, uh, gonna change anything between us, is it?"

"According to our friends, we've been together for a while, so no, I don't think anything needs to change." Edgeworth smirked, but it held only humor and teasing. _So he_ is _flirting with me?_

"Yeah, of course. I mean why change a good thing that we have, right? It's not like we need to tell everyone now since it's really all their fault that this happened in the first place." Phoenix was well aware he was rambling again, but he couldn't control his giddiness.

"Perhaps. Or perhaps it was inevitable." Before Phoenix could ask what he meant by that, the prosecutor walked off. "Now shut up and take me to dinner."


End file.
